How I Killed My Self Respect

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Lolbye

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Oct 9, 2016
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All The Bright Places
So. I used to scare myself a lot. Still do. But this one was really funny to me and it happened in... about 1 year ago now, when i was trying to go to sleep.

Note, i get jumpy easy, and i tend to overreact a lot, but this time, i legit couldn't stop laughing when i found out what had actually happened....

So i was watching loads stuff on YouTube, and all i remember was ending up on unsolved murder cases. Now, i was in a really bad place in August, and i had become super jumpy, at the smallest of things, litreally, peoples sudden heavy breathing made me shiver. Anyway, when i finished the video, i put away my phone, it was like... 2/3am and that video gave me slight shivers, as i was in the countryside at the time with my godmothers while my family was down where i actually lived for personal reasons. And you see, i got it into my head that they didn't lock the door. Not sure how or why, but i did. While i was trying to sleep, my mind decided to make me think about the video, and something popped into my head about one of the cases, something to do with a guy who was found dead, the countryside and etc, so my brain decided to say, "They're still out there. What if they meant this exact countryside. What if you're next. What if you're not thinking properly. They don't lock the doors either. You're probably going to die." And some other thoughts i probably can't say here. Now i started freaking out. Even with the knowledge someone was sleeping 5 feet away in the same room and the cat lying on the bed by feet, i suddenly realised. I was lying next to a window, so my first thought was "whyyyy" and so, after that, i was highly anxious. And of course, with my luck, i heard someones door open. I immediately jumped out of the bed and looked through the hallway. The only room that had other people in it ( my godmother and her husband ) was closed. So i was there, standing in the middle of a pitch black hallway, scared to death. Anyway, i grabbed a plant, ( don't know why i thought it could protect me ) and ran into the kitchen where i almost had a heart attack, because someone was actually there. Anyway, i legit ran at the guy and kicked him, to find out it was my godmothers husband. Yup. So anyway i didn't hurt him, i failed at even trying to kick him hard. All i did was really... nothing tbh. So yeah. He looked at me like: "wtf is wrong with you child." And yeah. I was told he was out gardening and he had to bring one the other cat, because it was going to rain. I also found out they locked the doors and all that. So yeah. I'm an idiot. And get scared by the noises of silence tbh. Anyway i went to bed and also had put the second cat on the end of my bed, and closed the door, because that cat needed to suffer my love and also it was quite a vicious cat and i wanted protection. ( that cat hated me btw )

The end

I also found out the murder case video i watched, the case i got worked up about, wasn't even based in Ireland... so idek how i got that stuff into my head
 
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