Whether or not you noticed, I don't really care, I was gone for the past 2 weeks.
I thought I'd tell you why.
Before I get started, I'd like to say something; I'm not doing this for attention or to make people feel sorry for me. I'm doing it strictly because I want you guys to know.
Lately, I've been dealing with a lot. Emotionally. My dad got oral and spinal cancer when I was 6, so he can't stand the cold winters of Colorado anymore. He always leaves to go to the Virgin Islands for the winter. He was an alcoholic and was on the wagon for most of my life. Recently, he started drinking again. It's been putting a strain on my family and he's denying doing it. I just put on my glasses and try to avoid my problems, but it always gets to me. MCPZ has always been an escape for me, but recently I've felt like it has been taking my life away from me. I took this small break to see what would happen. To be honest, I've been significantly happier. I might stay gone but then, that leads me to another one of my problems.
I want to leave, so bad, but I don't want to leave all the people I have to provide happiness for. My lifelong goal is to make people happy and I'm willing to disregard all of my own emotions to do so. If someone here needs me, I will stay, no matter my circumstances. When I see you guys happy, it makes me thrive on my own. But when I see my efforts go to waste, it makes me feel unworthy or being here. I don't know to stay or go, or just become... Less active. I'm at a crossroads in my life, and I have a lot more than I've said here. If you'd like to know more, please start a conversation with me or contact me another way.
Thank you for your precious time.
I thought I'd tell you why.
Before I get started, I'd like to say something; I'm not doing this for attention or to make people feel sorry for me. I'm doing it strictly because I want you guys to know.
Lately, I've been dealing with a lot. Emotionally. My dad got oral and spinal cancer when I was 6, so he can't stand the cold winters of Colorado anymore. He always leaves to go to the Virgin Islands for the winter. He was an alcoholic and was on the wagon for most of my life. Recently, he started drinking again. It's been putting a strain on my family and he's denying doing it. I just put on my glasses and try to avoid my problems, but it always gets to me. MCPZ has always been an escape for me, but recently I've felt like it has been taking my life away from me. I took this small break to see what would happen. To be honest, I've been significantly happier. I might stay gone but then, that leads me to another one of my problems.
I want to leave, so bad, but I don't want to leave all the people I have to provide happiness for. My lifelong goal is to make people happy and I'm willing to disregard all of my own emotions to do so. If someone here needs me, I will stay, no matter my circumstances. When I see you guys happy, it makes me thrive on my own. But when I see my efforts go to waste, it makes me feel unworthy or being here. I don't know to stay or go, or just become... Less active. I'm at a crossroads in my life, and I have a lot more than I've said here. If you'd like to know more, please start a conversation with me or contact me another way.
Thank you for your precious time.
I'm always here, so dont worry. You'll get through it 
